Project III



2002042101tid242|Cabernet and Toblerone'
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2002062601tid242|Nothing, is Sexy
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2002070101tid242|a tale of [...]
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2002081002tid242|perhaps not
2002081003tid242|Grey Goose Apple
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2002081301tid242|Heedless heart in heat
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2002091601tid242|Restless leaves that ride...
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hope in the pipeline


beta.01, template.

lines: current ~16oo
words: ~?

project III



Cabernet and Toblerone'
2002042101tid242

Gentle breeze through the valley
Along the Rhine alongst the trees
cherries in cold midsummer sun
Not nearly as fine as thou

Overlooking saints of Reisling
Rows of earth's divine
Apricots waif contentment
The silky scent of hair.

i've kissed the stone of ka'bah
Amongst the holy place of highness
Less touched by its grace
Than of your smile

Bound by silver cast in polish
Reiterating sweet promises
Remembering my thoughts
Still holding true.

Listening to Mozart
sheltered from midsummer rain
Boughs of comfort
Gentle is your embrace.

Beautiful it climbs
As if derived from within
Heart sings cello strings
Personifies my blood.

You mean more than worlds
Floating the beyond
You grant more than grace
By only being.

You mean more than words
Floating through the air
Picture perfect face
Smiles and cries.

Reflecting my thought,
Cabernet & Toblerone'

untitled:
2002042201tid242

can't run from hope
can't say no to fear
tied together
it becons you near

can't return regret
or light the darkest hour
defined by the one
who doesn't smell the flower

contribute time &
days fall to eve
losing the light
in darkness we grieve

wait for the morn
kept by your touch
leave inside your grace
i'm loving this so much

untitled:
2002042202tid242

eyes, gentle
peak inside my head
and she smiles

air breathed
touched by two bodies
reverberates exuberance

& life lived
fulfilled by fate
fades away

& we hold no regret
& we live no regret

untitled:
2002042601tid242

the chill in the air
innate of winter
still breathes of white snow
in staggered breaths

trees sway under bow of breeze
they stand alone
no leaves tremble upon bare branches
clawing fingers toward the sky

the heir of solice
inherits silence
mute inside my mind
in wonderment of all creation

yet i walk unfeeling
inside my thought
i contemplate the laws of reason
and i am the apostate

untitled:
2002042602tid242

rhymes from lips
like hearthache rips
gently
the stitches in my chest

eyes that cry
& softly lie
gently
to bring me to the test

smiles that fade
this price i've paid
dearly
for everything i'll save

love still died
in all i've tried
dearly
to forget what i forgave

untitled:
2002042603tid242

warriors scream
through bloody mics (microphones)
drowning in the hissssss

poets dream
through bloody thoughts
drowning in the piss

clergy seen
through bloody years
still drowning in their blisssssssssss

& nothing ever changes
for a verse that won't conform

untitled:
2002042604tid242

false & true
the facts that knew
opinion made for them
it's black & blue
the sharks that knew
religion gave to them

untitled:
2002042605tid242

hold my head
down under
put my thought
inside you
see my smile
you need me
i am the cross
that killed you

untitled:
2002042606tid242

bearded & bald
where does the sun shine?
your head of envy, empty.

untitled:
2002042801tid242

when your eyes close
i feel like i disappear
and when absence draws your breath
echoing memories upon soft walls
i feel like i disappear

when you close the door
i feel like life's elapsed
and when i sense you stirring
inside rooms filled without me
i feel like life's elapsed

your back turned so cold
i am but broken
and while my eyes follow you
gracing away like waterfalls
i am but failing to stop the stream
tumbling softly spilling pour memories
into pools reflecting greener glades
and smiles remembered trapped in crystal haven
inside of which i am but broken

when you leave
in every moment
in dream i wake to find myself empty
as time flows toward a future without you
the glade seems washed cleansed by sorrow
yet failing to redeem
and inside myself i awake
in every moment
again without you

untitled:
2002042901tid242

beautiful things blossom
though strange & subtle
two disconnected smiles
growing ever fondly of friendly fields
filled with meadow sounds & gentle sun.

as life's amalgam
ties unto itself
rivets upon stone facings
scaling ever forgotten feet & heights
we lay, and life is beautiful

but sex burns down love
as it always does
and we stand forlorn in the ashes
counting cars under grey skies
no end to this disease everlasting

life loved in ruin
so quickly it consumes
tears mark failures in a journey
waylaid by abandon the storm seems to follow
marking for darkness every breath of future
and every sigh of silence

untitled:
2002050101tid242

new dawn yawns
saying goodbye
to months
passed away
& today
dreams of a bright future
promised by tomorrow
or yesterday
no different
in any event
sometimes people wander
from the past
to the new
reliving theirs forgotten
but time itself uneventful
leaves the lookers behind

untitled:
2002050102tid242

a country
and a world of life
spending too much
time & money
on hate

a life
and a cultured country
spending too much
love & lie
on fate

and i
a nothing
spending too much
thought & fear
on life

untitled:
2002050103tid242

coffee & steam
with eggs & toast
or waffles
stolen from the sun

under an air
of light & excitement
for a new day of play
it's saturday
it's saturday

& friday with supper
a fine Barbera
thick & dry
enough without excess
baptised in sleep
it seems life's new

but back to now
the day grows longer
& breakfast, brunch
fades to lunch
the centre of a day
of eating & reading
& company of those i love

it's saturday
it's saturday

untitled:
2002050104tid242

the best things
to enjoy
in life without a point

are little smiles
giving hope
that today may actually matter

or thick breve'
warming the soul
or something i wish i had

& phone's ring
with your voice
telling me you care

these are the best
albeit not all
in an utterly pointless life

untitled:
2002050105tid242

rain changing to snow
looks pretty & fragile
but the ice upon the road
causes too much pain

leaves changing to gold
look pretty & fragile
but leaves upon the road
belie their colour

resolve setting your jaw
you look so beautiful yet fragile
but footprints on the trail
remain without a friend

untitled:
2002050106tid242

still pools reflect autumn sky
gentle leaves fire orange in emotion
float like yachts without a breeze
though lacking a keel anyway

& no whim may touch serenity
existing only now within my eyes
reflecting back only stillness & solice
though fire burns within

untitled:
2002050201tid242

so tell me:
did it ever sweep you away?
did you ever think to say
today is the best day of all?

is life's picture ever grand?
in colour does it seem to stand
apart like it's the very best?

so show me:
why you didn't let you win
but you let it take you in
sin inside the best day of all

if reprieve can mean retreat
or if faith can ever meet
the truth in the best day of all

untitled:
2002050202tid242

human beings
like me
would spend their lives
slavery

helping hands
touch me
folding resolve
eagerly

long lives
'fore me
representing time
constantly

untitled:
2002050203tid242

so long for 'need me'
but i couldn't find
forever blind
& lost today
but so long
so long for 'need me'

untitled:
2002050204tid242

a mind may wander
without perspective
unforseen contentment
in the wide of wonder

those eyes may descry
with nothing left to see
sight begets such blindness
in a world that does not try

one life may flounder
without a hint of purpose
living becomes resentment
as sentience seems a blunder

untitled:
2002050601tid242

black & white education
makes one nation
under god
hate the free
[...]

untitled:
2002050801tid242

the sun
in all its glory
still fails
to show face

in self-righteous blunder
hidden behind the veil of sadness
still without desire to
light this world

dreary clouds cover
a scarred land
riddled with faces
cursed by their fathers
& the sun seems content
behind the mask
shedding indifference

& like a lover waiting
on the end of a phone
that will not ring
in silence

we all wait hopeful
unto the end of time
& yet the day
continues to cry
under the veil
of sadness

untitled:
2002050802tid242

there exist sometimes a gap
in space & in time
a moment & all else fades away
a pause like a sigh
before drifting into slumber
an eternity buried
inside the eyes of another
it exists & yet it does not
slow, soft & beautiful
only in and of itself
it becomes everything
in its absence
& in its stead
a moment alone
worth all the people
in the world
just one moment
alone

untitled:
2002050803tid242

xenu graft
puts thoughts
into people
ere could learn
to love

untitled:
2002050804tid242

one voice echos
as it touches
stone walls
shedding itself upon
the weeping masses
groundlings understand
only what they
could never be
only what their
lives have not
only in the name of
but they just want
to feel
& so they try

untitled:
2002050805tid242

food sits untouched
upon polished stone
uneaten & unappreciated
cachexic lips long hopefully
but for a different kind of sustenance

empty pages
glaring neglegence
reside inside leather bindings
unworthy of being opened
by the absence therein

blank mind circles
empty thoughts wishing
it could fill those pages
or ease the hunger so confused of withdrawl
socially & physically it's swirling
in the deepest crevasses of dura matter
& no one knows
where the toughts went
or what became of the person
who simply ceased to be...

untitled:
2002051901tid242

cheap food on clumsy china
designed to break
without finesse
tastes like
massed market
pilsner
tasting of nothing
but my money spent
to drink
not nearly enough
booths identical
stretch
like skin striving
to contain the glutony
therein that beggs to be fed
something heavy
something big
something to slide down the
gullet & taste the minde
& ease the hunger brought
forth by the almighty
substitution syndrome
misadventure, yet still
i, like my clones, brethren, children
sit, star & eat unto the end.

untitled:
2002051902tid242

poor music
drives the soul to poverty
placing little feelings
in the forefront of thought
this isn't me
drowning in the most benal
of that which
i thought i'd lost
or i wish we could just shed away
but it lives inside
lurking eternal
without guilt nor remorse
too far above its brawn
& its breadth
small hands play with its might
though lost in darkness
masqued lashes tasting strength
unknown is the stroke they wield.

untitled:
2002052801tid242

cherry trees blossom
pushing pink promiscuity
interlaced with fragrance
belying but innocence

but then the rains came
to wash the pain away
under grey skies
weeps for sunshine lost

dusk dawns stars
lulling busy wings to sleep
grounding lofty laughter
in a silence made of closure

untitled:
2002052802tid242

time seems as nothing
when nothing ever happens
yet becomes everything
when it destroys the things you love

like a verse tarnished with age
figurative & forlorned
a cypher in the midst
of swirling leaves & autumn breeze

if eternity can stretch hearts
though feelings change
maybe the worthless blink
lf this life
has yet a hope of fear

Nothing, is sexy
2002062601tid242

A still and empty night
And starless sky mirrors
complacency
Waters girgle in brooks unseen
In the background beyond
The curtain of velvet air

Stillness though sunlight
Solace inside a moment
Between the shifting winds
Silence pervades the forest
Filled with trees
Who just don’t care

Rhymes may happen
Yet rhythm falter
In a poem implied by thought
A depthless puddle wet and sad
Mirrors stillness tears
Windows inside and black as nothing

Though rain tumbles
Upon sullen shingles
Left outside this smile
i lay, a full head
Reeling with emptiness
beside you i don’t even need to think

And nothing, is sexy.

untitled:
2002062602tid242

time meanders
nothing happens
yet this means
something

words said
through but silence
you don’t have to say
i know your intent
silence

electronic footprints
grace your house
remember i called?
2600 & twisted copper
they remember
my voice

did you even hear
or listen
or try to understand
or maybe you did
a reflection of me
alone

untitled:
2002062603tid242

a man might love another
or think he does
until all is lost
and covenant broken
into bitter thoughts

forgiveness reaps failure
and mockery of justice
weather deserved or destroyed
a joker’s dance of love
but every day can’t be merry

harsh and still the ashen hearth
remembers thou aren’t so cold
yet the devil licks with malice
burning all the fathers
who’ve lived so long for nothing

if, at some end, or time elapsed
of something i then dream
whether you’ll be there
inside my head, afore these eyes
or temptation’s scream
for in the beginning there was fire
but before its tongue, was nothing.

a tale of 2 cities, a queen of hearts & the spaded king
2002070101tid242

a graceful harmony
between two points
two worlds and two cities
life but anxious hops from here to there

a tach too high
builds exhilaration
climbing a mountain of measure
though the adventurous burn
in fire along the way

so much closer to the end
the weight of revelation
tips scales toward the wall
the fulcrum far behind

no longer in harmony
a forgotten future
once seen from far beyond

now fate upon us
atop the road of life
perceptions shift subtle
like the passing landscape
yet now is the will be
and we've already forgotten its fortune

untitled:
2002071001tid242

a million miles away
though only a day
grey skies mask the golden hegemon
trying in vain to light a void of nothing
a failing plight to swim in a sea
of drowning darkness
tears fall from heaven
like a sullen cacophony of sorrow
frogs burble in the silence left by crickets
who cannot find it in their hearts to sing
and oppression screams its soft severence
into the labyrinth of thought
chasing deep ideas into the foundation
of thought, of desire, of need
yet still today, frowning clouds
paint dark these eyes looking hopeless past today
and yesterday a million miles away
tomorrow's cloathed only in black

untitled:
2002071101tid242

grey swept away
though shrouds the soul
its memory lingers upon the breast
fiery fury beats down
hating all the tears
cool music forgotten under the stare of hate
& misled crickets chirp amongst the bones
frogs died or fled or, i don't know...
shadows still pervade wrought blind by the light
a new kind of fear
just as destitute, just as hopeless
one world under god, dead as
billions of babes born to drone
never feel, nor love
force fed enlightenment
yesterday the sadness seemed so simple
but today its nadir consumes deeper than the sun
today's not black but a billion miles from then

untitled:
2002071102tid242

a box empty
empty head
empty bed
a damaged creature
asleep on the couch
glowing embers she remembers
smoking soot clouds hazy eyes
glazed by stagnance of romance felt
or dreamed in shadows flickering blue
dancing comatose mockery of sentience
upon bare walls & empty halls echo
eerie songs of velvet suede in absence of life
or bustle or reason to hustle
a falling myriad of lights in the dark
or diamonds set in stone
rest in peace fair enfant terrible
thy failure at the hand of webs we
weave & sew the seeds of season's snow
& river's flow though whistles blow
past towels in the fray ensueing silence
for she's the one who quit
tried but failed
she tried, and she gave up
on the couch, lonely
the bed, lonely
chocolates eaten
tyramine head dreams of only
failure, she dreams of only fear.

untitled:
2002071501tid242

is there any such thing?
Sometimes i wonder
Sometimes i dream
'afore i awake
to the smell of coffee
bitter sweet like braided hair
Medusa looks so lovely
Gaud i love the cold
Perfection frozen into sleep
Far less cruel without a care
Compassion found only in unconsciousness
Drinking coffee i try to read
In long morning hours
Aside the maw of the soldering serpent
Wyrm wriggles wingless she awakes
Pray for prey the huntress owns today
Satin sheets stained sickly steamed
Innocent in their defilement
The presumption of my cause
Bay's broken yonder mons
& blinds the troll to stone
i am nothing inside her gaze
for horrible moments
writhing in ecstasy
testure of the mind & body
i really thought it was
sweet succubus
but is there any such thing?

untitled:
2002071701tid242

if i were a cry for help
the empty void devoid
of even my echo
would be you
and your eyes
reflections of passerbys
descries disquiet
i churn with nothing
misplaced as anguish
and spilled with disgust
there is not bottom
farther than the light
slipping through fingers
like lost children's pleas
forced bloody knees
bear the disease
of torture's testure
cruel jester
the sad molester
like me filled with nothing
the children oblivious
to the cries for help
and no one even listens

untitled:
2002071702tid242

earning yearning
i sit in silence
only a whir of the word
buzzzzzzz, distractions
ants scurry relentless
with broken homes
nowhere to run
nowhere to go
i sit in silence
yearning earning

untitled:
2002071801tid242

liquid skin
loose over
syncromesh
swirls under strain
of movement
congruent with
an empty head
obsessed against
all reason
repressed beyond
all though
outside of madness
a convex collage
painting mirrored
panoramas of pain
picture perfect peace
anorexia knows no rest

untitled:
2002071802tid242

something about the eye
the glance, the smile
a music in the stride
graceful, delicate
what is it that i can't explain?
Disquiet manner of inner fear
Withdrawn to contemplation
Is the world empty?
i see you & think it's not
But alone trapped inside the head
i can't escape
With even you, nowhere to go
I'm told to smile
To walk & laugh
But where are we going?
Onward to the end
A bust does not suffice
i want sunshine
i want to feel alive
i want pears
On a hot summer day
Was i even born
Can i even feel?
A barren world full of these things
Here i am, yet where are you?

untitled:
2002071901tid242

soft exhale as i kiss your lips
i feel your warm breath upon mine
joining fates swirling into the world
your body trembles timidly
response to my lightest tough
upon your back, your shoulders, your nape
you touch my heart
shadows dance & fathoms flicker
like a summer in the forest
a fragrance of life, of shelter
embrace like i belong
is it for now?
Is it forever?
Is it even real,
Remembering moments in memory
Jaded perhaps by silence
Perhaps by longing
Or perhaps simply by recollecting
This day. So far away
So far above in this below
Ambivalence of wretchedness
The same lonely soul
The same eyes closing
Like doors to a world inside my own
Impressions i have spent
Upon trails lost for the trees
I only want to feel
Or at least believe

untitled:
2002080601tid242

a friend without love
is but a cold pair of shoulders
in the night
and her smile
can do little more
than bear resemblance
to the ray of sunshine
i've falsely come to expect
from something i never had
maybe if i were someone else
maybe more simple in inclination
if i didn't ask 'why'
then maybe i'd know
if justification escaped me
maybe i'd love
or maybe i'd care
but here again
i sit
i ponder
absorbing pragmatism
from a world
that knows not these things
nor cares to matter
in lieu of weighty affairs
a thousand worlds over
miles away eyes stare
at only abstraction
or distraction
panorama concave enclave
my loss is my strength
is all i see

untitled:
2002080602tid242

darling city
where i belong
'cross boughs of flame
& oceans long

trifle trifles
should i ensue
singing life
& mine's for you

worlds away?
just the 'mar
a shackled life
can't see that far

untitled:
2002080603tid242

bloody Belfast
fucking Friday
kills a day immortal
in the name of christ
jesus fucking
dead a bloke immortal
as a name for Friday
Belfast bloody

untitled:
2002080604tid242

paper print preacher's flint & turbid tinder
lights a worthless world afire burning desire dire
hunger lost cold empty ash grey quiet
turn on the TV turn up the TV
an empty head's penchant for fire
an empty body's penchant for desire
for this empty picture penchant i admire

'has it been 2 years?':
2002080605tid242

if living days are absent clouds away
listless inside blue skies blessing
wind-swept oceans of rolling rye
just a gentle breath
managed in the stillness
felt when crickets sleep
then days pass humbly
without the faintest signs of life
& the living days but toys
a soul blown apart by sunshine
hope buried by an inopportune time
to ever say what we mean
to those we may happen to love
lost & loaned away

wish upon a falling star:
2002081001tid242

seemingly random
fates intertwine
and wrap themselves
around obsolescent
absolutism

just another day
made by hands
of long ago reaching
from depths of NeverWinter
cyclopes cant' descry

perhaps, perhaps
she murmurs from repose
ripples through volcanic glass [obstinate obsidian] blackness
a star-stained tainted sky
holes in peace like mired thoughts
white lies of chaos upon contrast

the heavy hand of habit
weighs so haunted upon the breast
resisting the cure…
…withdrawal…
weighs so haunted upon the beast
a million points of light
the mind so craves to share

bartering better sleep
bedrest by the wayside
prose composed in the dead head of solitude
so many things to say
but dare i breathe let alone whisper
lest the heavens shine too bright
lest wishes be made to falter
in the expected august shower

no…no says the cure
who dies in a world without
a universe blossomed epochs ago
through knots not made undone
better in darkness, ripples in a dream
the retreat of silence echoes shivering leaves
and trickling water through mountain streams
feeding glades green with life and sweet with rain
a sun won't disappear in light of light
nor moon falter falling flotsam
i give to sleep and won't remember
under the umbrella of perseid tears
and once again, i throw away the cure

perhaps not:
2002081002tid242

in another bed, somewhere far away
perhaps there lays a frail, thinking of me
perhaps not.

in another life, somewhere does not exist
perhaps i could have been, anything else
perhaps not.

dreams unrealized, and the could have beens
are the hardest bearers of bad news
boding lament to a million failures
one couldn't have known existed
only until right now.

better to have loved or lost
are you loving or losing
lost to loving or loving loss
where was i
was i loss or love
was i even either
perhaps that person thinks of me
in another of her lives, a dream come so tardy
but what a bitter word, tart as tardy
a requiem for something
perhaps not.

Grey Goose Apple [Snow White Apple]:
2002081003tid242

rain outside
subdues the cries of mosquitoes
hungry for a shot of life

a peaceful plentitude
so symbolized by water from the sky
[a gift of long and dreary grey skies]
looking for a place to rest [cry]

the discovery of reciprocation
or at least compassion
the hope of something greater
partially fulfilled

is more than the rain
is more than respite
is more than Grey Goose
in a stranger's magic fruit

yet it all means nothing
or even less
but such is the way of lure
on its path to love and loss

untitled:
2002081101tid242

could the wispy weeping willow
winds whisper words wanting
anything alluring from lost lore
locked in voices carried upon an
upset torrid torrent
a contradiction in the night
burning throbbing temples
marked to a religion, dying
an idle idol floating toward
the ides of July's seizure
the seven stiles summoning
smoldering sloth inside the one
used to make me smile
used to make me smile
used to make me sick no longer
another messiah in the dark
groping with hope behind the night
a mental game for desdemona
a guiltless death i die
inside suede solace of a second
the first forgotten, almost
in the night, in stillness, silence
i hear the whore upon the heir
to air forever to remember
a temple once visited
a spring in which i once bathed
words once carried and married
unto the wishes of a wanderer
now inside a strange yet homely land
a butterfly's beat of breath
far across oceans apart
tearing down my world
slowly, softly, silently, slyly
can west winds know the words they carry
can gentle trees feel pleas of the nigh yet afar
i think they can
i think they can
and from the depths of the unconscious messiah's eyes
i think i feel it too..

Heedless heart in heat:
2002081301tid242

heedless heart in heat of hate
spews forth a thought
steeped in words
without a hope of revocation
tears through the flesh
caged inside a sick skeletal skin
open those eyes and let me in
but a damaged creature
no fault outside of guilt
unable to empathize
let alone sympathize
or even euthanize
stones stand lonely circles
decrepit memories
not withstood any test
let alone time
melting faces to
reflections in the mud
paying homage to the fact
that i once cared
silence speaks volumes
though you sought
between the lines
you could not
or would not
you shouldn't even fucking try
closed eyes still see
healed skin still bleeds
birds chirp into deaf ears longing
hope begets fear
we all see the inside
everywhere
missed of all, fell spirit
don't even fucking try

untitled:
2002090101tid242

a dead man's daughter
laughs as though a fickle
life worth living lost languishing thoughts
now laid to rest eternal.
poor minds study
to no avail
chewing gum tongue
covets come &
triumph wrung
nervous hands practiced
patience for impulsive
compulsion, instinct
knows no rest
benzoic acid tickles
fancy suede that
tickles flesh
that knows its own
is humanity doomed?
i shudder to even ask.

untitled:
2002090102tid242

ten thousand million
slides, spiral slope ever
upward, away from reason
thought not bereft of any
logic, too many people
makes too much sense.
right here, right now
teetering upon the brink
of religion's gullibility

untitled:
2002090301tid242

dead head behind
blank head wonders
shallow thoughts fall
forever never conceived
yet still believed with
steadfast derelict
starflecked glitter cheeks
atop a nape that speaks
in wasted whisper
whimpering willow lieth
loth & limbo pillow
stretches time & taste
lies catatonic
vocable animal
mind's pneumonic
spilling seeds of
raze & glaze of haze
into pools of emerald
iris bleeds of deeds
not oft remembered
nor feelings tendered
from hearts still rendered
sad cut & bleeding bulls
bruised by china
too fine to touch
the empty head that
thinks too much
don't you try
don't even dare
cannabinoid synapse
is yours as heir

untitled:
2002090302tid242

night falls
around the tower
becoming lights
the Eiffel flower

like a weed
above the serf
shines the grace
of my rebirth

grovel by day
play be eve
the absent sun
grants my leave

laughing now
for time is flying
i cry inside
as night keeps dying

Restless leaves that ride uneasy winds:
2002091601tid242

'neath heavy lids lies a penchant for love
her lowered eyes belie fire from above

a heart so haunted, shadow of the cure
'cross a thousand moon's heirs are resting here

under my gaze, as if she doesn't know
lost and lonely eyes bequeath her sorrow

losing what's already lost
no rhythm, no rhyme in realization
just empty, the permanence of impermanence.

untitled:
2002091602tid242

shouting, screaming, grating, crying,
into the void, it stands empty
falling in would bring you no nearer
but could it deliver me from this place?

untitled:
2002091801tid242

all the little lies, and little things, and little words
leaching lissome star-crossed star dust
leaching listless little things inside
leaching preaching princess Pandora
long since converted
long since filled these eyes with picture perfect peace
long since filled these eyes with picture perfect pain
long since filled these eyes bathed with blurry tears

all the little lies, and little things, and little words
all the little memories weighing a little mind
all the little thoughts too easy at the time
all the little people, one more godless

repeat reproach request contest
circular thought repeats repeats
repeats all the little long since leaching the mind
of all the little lies, words and things
i thought i once was.

untitled:
2002091802tid242

if there is ever a time since, away
gone, perhaps to stay
just numbers apart
a whole world of wanting
remains so small

untitled:
2002100201tid242

diamond water falls
down gentle face
unequivocal
cascade of myriad
mystique,
so still
still so perfect
the eternal drop
& pang & pluck & blurp
night moon white
waves ripple 'cross
still waters, time
a fountain, forever
falls away

untitled:
2002100202tid242

same sky leans heavy
home so far away
while the sky falls
inside my head
creeping footsteps trod
beaten paths trampled
before i can hear
them, i can feeeeel them
furthering their furthest reaches
tendrils twirl wispy circles
that burrow ever deeper
through sticky webs o'er
the great divide, they
taunt the now shudders
toward the ledge with
everything horrible looking on
[with] triumphant wicked smiles
wars went & winners remain
to clamber up high places
driving though before them
i without a home
forever far away
every time the sky falls

untitled:
2002100203tid242

human beings
such needy creatures
damages heart within
a heartbeat
humble happiness
falls to fascade
& ego & ergo
et al ad hox
ad nauseum ad lib
a lie a life
aloof these creatures
need such human beings

untitled:
2002100204tid242

dank water swirls
in the basements
of big houses
and empty palaces
all the better to
drown below
and be lost
in dark places
people never bother
to look,
& he who's lost
may never be found

untitled:
2002100205tid242

one seat, upon the throne
saved inside, for oh so long
a ghost watches over
forests of thorns
& cries of dust
flickering of snickering
who is the shadow?
who owns this life?

untitled:
2002100301tid242

sunlight, sunshine
like a little prayer
canto con qualcosa
like café con leche
if divine dictums
about to promise
what i've found
then magic makes
belonging, aside
from longing
for just a little
prayer, make-believe
something i can't
qualify, that qualcosa
or fine fandango
it gives me something
somewhat like
a breath of sunshine

SEX on the brain:
2002101101tid242

and nothing else,
Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr............

untitled:
2002101601tid242

they can't take hope away
they say
whoever "they" may be
people die wishing
in matters of all things lost
fed by smiles,
fed by the people in my head
dare to be hopeful,
the first step out the door
imperiled is this facade
to the end
there's nothing in this world
but hands & pillows
nuances that distract
from work, or whathaveyou
the hopefull'll have me do
as an object of desire
spindly legs hath lost
their magic, spider
hands clasp cold as steel
rosy cheeks they'll never feel
their existence lies
ultimately empty
should they even dare to hope
to dream, expect?
would they then promise
places they've not seen
& smiles they've not felt?
hope is a lie
on a slippery slope to sanity
ignorance lines rock bottom
is this my fucking dream?

untitled:
2002101602tid242

knowledge begets discontentment
that said before brews resentment
cooling off brings bigger holes
& storms inside post hope has died
1 candle makes 1 room magic
but illuminates wicks lost & tragic
forgotten shadows frequent that room
and anxious thoughts so quickly assume
all things past & present plight
will die a grisly death tonight
so lay back now, the 'mor i won't exist
inside a fate i can't resist

untitled:
2002102001tid242

sweet zucchini
with the season
ripe of supper
and shaved carrot
in olive oil
between sips of
il Chianti
lei porgera
tua mano
molto tenue
con permesso
sei il mondo
molte grazie
for sharing life
at least in part
soddisfaro
i love this place
e lei, e lei?

untitled:
2002102002tid242

excitement mounts
my day, birthday
toys and things
and smiles and cake
and friends and food
and toys and things
and smiles and cake
and ad verbatim
on my day, birthday
waiting for (right) now
i can hardly think
everything's happy
everyone loves me
everything for everyone
half a decade tucked away
i'll smile forever if here i stay
the small with spirit, spunk and zeal
innocent face of truth for real
his whole world of parents made
the score of love these years hath played

untitled:
2002102003tid242

daring, cautious
to be hopeful
opaque opal
almond eyes
on for size
me up, down
to the ground
out of the rain
the same thoughts march
2 abreast
just me and you
together knew
such thing as lust
addiction trust
everything i'd give
up for granted
just to live
a world recanted
but for you
and me like
day anew
refreshment sunshine
too good to be mine.

untitled:
2002102004tid242

the system's sentinel
a million babies
i'd sire for god
the man-beast flawed
of souls does thirst
vampiric sycophant's
pain rehearsed
and a million babes
sent to hell
'fore dying well in
wallowing pleasure
sloth's greatest treasure
the fat man's fuck
flock's lazy luck
non-virgin people
spread wide the steeple
tartar puss sings the sore
religion's wretched hungry whore

untitled:
2002102005tid242

lay back softly down to sleep
darkness shines from blindness keep
o'er mountains, far away
people pray their waking day
for but respite you enjoy
rest for now morn's never coy

untitled:
xxx


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